The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
