so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
i think im in europe. pls send help
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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