If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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