I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
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