rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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