no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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