That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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