Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I party with great urgency now.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
