i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize