All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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