No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
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