its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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