somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
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