He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
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