I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
