the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Randomize
