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we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
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