So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
