Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
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