Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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