she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Randomize
