Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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