I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I supernannyed him into submission
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize