So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
