Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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