Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..