So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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