Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
