I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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