i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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