he looks like a really good dad on facebook
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
