There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
