I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
