Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize