this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
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