My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize