After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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