The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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