bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
