I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Randomize
