Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
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