i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
