Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
