He is an equal opportunity slut.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
