At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Randomize
