I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
