I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
