I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize