i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I've blown a few things in my day
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Randomize