Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I could fuck to npr.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Randomize
