9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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