Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
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